Rin is in an interesting position where objectively speaking she has it easier than the other FSN heroines, but also there’s the interesting fact that Rin does believe she has it easier. She doesn’t think life has been rough for her, she is treating her own struggles lightly.
Rin has lost so much in a short span of time and is placing high expectations for herself and she thinks that’s all fine, it’s completely fine to self isolate and not get close to people
It’s perfectly fine if she gets to only look at Sakura from a distance, as long as Sakura is smiling, even though she’d love nothing more than to hear Sakura calling her her sister
And yet Rin is quick to suggest allying with Shirou, and she’s quick to move into his house the moment he accepts, and she gets shy around Sakura and agrees on having breakfast with her when she admits she doesn’t ever have breakfast, but if Sakura asks her to, then it’s fine
She craves connecting with people, she wants to be around people, but she can’t do that. After all, that’s not the life of a mage, and perhaps, if she were to get close, she’ll simply lose them.
Her life is full of memories of parting, after all.
She has to act cold, and she has to be rude, that way she can make sure not to get close, so that moment she says goodbye again, it won’t hurt too much.
Her face looks cute, trying to hold back the tears. Rather than expressing the attachment he feels, he looks at the boy lying in the distance.
“Please take care of me. I think you know, but I am unreliable.
“Please support me.”
The knight says so as if it’s somebody else’s business.
“Yeah, I know. I’ll do my best. I’ll do my best so that he won’t get twisted like you. I’ll do my best so that he will be able to like himself…!
So you should also—”
—forgive yourself.
She does not put it into words. She looks up at the disappearing knight with a flood of emotions.
-thinks forever nonstop about Rin’s absolute determination to make sure Shirou has a happy ending, that even if he follows the path of a hero of justice that his ending still does not need to be a sad one and her willingness to walk directly alongside him to ensure that happens-
I forgot to post the edits i did for the illya AMV so here they are at full resolution (including the improved translation of that one sword dancers panel)
ALT
